Washing and brushing Teeth with my 9 year old Daughter

by Rebecca Goodwin
(Aliso Viejo, Ca usa)

I have a 9 year old Daughter who was diagnosed with SPD when she was 8 months old

( well at the time it was only gross motor delay. However, as she got older all the signs for Hypersensitive appeared. She never put anything in her mouth. Screamed at loud noises. Wouldn't put feet on the ground and so on and so forth)

She has been in treatment since she was 8 months and has come a long way. She still strangles at school with being around large groups of kids and having them touch her.

She doesn't eat her lunch at lunch time because it's to loud and overwhelming with all the kids and chaos.

She also can not play on any team sports or participate in any after school activities. She just wants to come home and be home where it's " safe " for her.

My biggest struggle to date continues to be her hygiene. She refuses to bath, wash her body with soap and was her hair on a weekly basis.

When we do have to fight to get her in the bath, my husband and I have to shut all the windows in the house because from the outside, anyone listening would think we were literally torturing her.
" No mommy please stop, your hurting me. Stop it , I hate you. You're so mean. I'm calling the police "

It's crazy.

We have a 6 year old who will shower by herself and full scrub herself head to toe and wash her hair all by herself. Plus, brushes her teeth daily without being asked.

Reese, the older daughter, also refuses to wash her face and hands and as mentioned, brush her teeth.

The axiety and stress it causes me on a daily bases is getting far to much for me to bare. She won't change her underwire daily.

O/T can't help at this point anymore and I'm at a loss as to what else I can do. PLEASE HELP!!!!!

She gets violent, destructive and aggressive towards me and her little sister when bath time approaches each and every night. So many things have been broken and I've been scratched, bitten, hit, kicked.

How do I get my 9 year old to bath, brush her teeth and hair. Wash her face and hands and change her underpants daily without such dramatic tantrums everyday????