SPD or just being a toddler?

so a few things about my daughter and you can weigh in on whether or not i am over reacting.

first, i have a son who just turned 6 that has mild spd...he is highly sensitive emotionally and suffers from anxiety. has dyspraxia and at odd times mentions the sun being too bright, or it being too loud in school etc and has some visual processing (i.e. tracking and spatial issues). i feel as though he is sensory seeking but then has a very difficult time falling asleep at night. we just learned about spd a few months ago, but since then i have done more research that i care to admit and feel like i could write a book (as most of you probably feel as well!). so here is my laundry list. please tell me if i need to stop reading these websites bc i am creating problems that aren't there...or if there might be more going on! thank you!

one thing that i have learned is that very often at least one of the siblings in a family are affected with spd. which brings me to my daughter. she is just shy of her 2nd bday. as a baby the only thing that really sticks out is that she HATED her baby carseat and would scream when we put her in it and would only stop when we picked it up to swing it....and i do remember her crying when we would stop the car and then quiet when we were moving again.

i also feel that my daughter is a sensory seeker. she loves loves jumping on anything, has begun climbing everything, will stand next to you and free fall on top of you, gets aggressive with her siblings (hitting and kicking) often screeches if people/kids come too close to her. she also LOVES to yell at her baby sister (who is a year) to make her cry. she can be very sweet...but she is also pretty tough, kind of growls and swipes alot and definitely has a strong personality.

she is a very light sleeper, wakes instantly the second anyone walks into her bedroom no matter if she has been sleeping for 5 min for 5 hours.

she is a very picky eater...eats cheese, yogurt, fruit, mac and cheese cereal bars...those are all given...anything else is a crapshoot. she doesn't eat any meat except occasional chicken nuggets, doesn't eat any kind of sandwiches, doesn't like crackers, sometimes eats pizza but not often...she will eat any dessert! but has a very limited palette and her baby sister often eats at least twice as she does.

she doesn't have any clothes aversions...but has recently been insisting on wearing shoes and refuses to take them off, even to sleep (but who knows, she just might think her shoes are fun).

she HATES HATES having her hair washed and absolutely refused to let me lay her back to wash her hair (much as her brother did)...i mean, she flips out and fights me and screams...however she loves to swim and splash. we don't have any issues with hair cuts or nail cutting however.

she gets startled easily and cries at the sound of vacuums...and will cry at the hair dryer if i don't show it to her first...and often still cries. but if i don't warn her she will come sprinting for me. or if she gets startled by me yelling at the dog she stops what she is doing and runs as fast as she can toward me whimpering...and then after she realizes everything is ok she will go back to playing.

she will NOT let me leave the room. we are very often in our living room because it is gated in with the kids toys...and she can be content playing on the floor...but the second that i even stand up she jumps up and is ready to follow me. she wants to be carried a ton and when i am sitting on the couch she often likes to come up and straddle me (facing me). she cries horribly when i leave the house.

she LOVES swinging and could do it all day...but she does NOT spin or anything like that.