Help! 5 1/2 year old Still Uses Pacifier

Hi All. My 5 1/2 year old daughter still uses her "suckie/pacifier". When she turned 4 we attempted to take it away from her, but weaning her off by limiting times of day she may use it.




She somewhat adjusted however she began to put everything that could fit in her mouth in her mouth...shopping cart handles, restaurant tables, rockes...etc... She started getting sick more frequently so I opted to give them back to her. I felt I'd rather have her sucking on a pacifier than things that had no business in her mouth.

She quit getting sick and has only had 1 cold since then. However, the last time we were at the doctor a few weeks ago, she was terrified, so I let her bring it in and the doctor said I really need to get rid of it. I told her that they were working on it in therapy...she said ok.

I talked to the therapist yesterday and explained to her the above and that I actually kept a daily log of when she used it and when she gave it to me and it worked out that she uses it for a total of about 2 hours out of 24 hours a day. To me that is not a big deal. She needs it to calm herself...she uses primarily when she is, scared, upset or tired. That is it. She sometimes says I'm a big girl and don't need it, but then she does when she is ready for sleep. She is SPD and OCD and on the rather immature side. It is my opinion and belief that she will get rid of it when she is ready and able to calm other ways.

I have tried the all the chewy stuff and it does not work for her...she wants nothing to do with it. The therapist did not seem concerned with the pacifier use at this point. I am posting mostly because I was looking for some support, advice or just to know that it is ok that she still has it and that someday she won't need it anymore. I know she is not typical and I think these doctors sometimes forget that. She is perfect in every way and is such a sweet beautiful child...that to look at her you would never belief that she has these issues. I am open to any advice or support anyone has.

Thank you...and hugs to you all.



Comments for Help! 5 1/2 year old Still Uses Pacifier

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Aug 01, 2023
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hi im vivi and i still use binkys
by: vivi

hi im vivi and i still use binkys my mom made me keep them she said i needed them i use mine all the time at first i didnt like it but mom made me listen to this weird sound thing on her phone a bunch and now i love them.

Jun 11, 2022
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my daughter still uses them too
by: Anonymous

my girl is 15yo and shes used them her entire life she only takes it out to eat or drink she even talks with it in im not bothered by it shes happy with them so i have no plans to take them away

May 15, 2022
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my 13 y/o daughter still uses them
by: Anonymous

ive never bothered weaning her off them so theyve stayed with her through her whole life. she doesnt care who sees her with them, and is almost always got 1 in her mouth. super smart kid, can speak fine even with them in, so i dont see an issue with it

Nov 01, 2021
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Wooow!
by: Anonymous

Take the Binki and throw in the trash. That simple. These kids are like addicts and your just enabling them! set boundaries and follow them. Since when does a 4year old get to make the decisions???

Oct 25, 2021
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6.5 yrs and quit
by: Anonymous

I have always thought she’ll quit when she’s ready, I sucked my thumb until I was 11…so it didn’t pressure her to quit, I knew she would when she was ready. One day out of the blue, she was ready. She was so proud and excited!!! We went to build a bear and she put it in her bear and she earned a sleepover (since she couldn’t do that with a pacifier). She even told her friend why she earned the sleepover, not embarrassed. :)

She cried the first night, but made it through. Talked about it off and on. Actually found a pacifier after and handed it to me, even though she she wanted it.

The odd thing is, all was fine for 4 months, then she started talking about it again, she’s almost 7.5 years now and still talks about it when she’s tired that she really needs it. She doesn’t get one since she gave it up, I’m just surprised after all this time she still wants it. She is a chewer though and has anxiety, so I guess it makes sense.

Aug 18, 2021
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Empathizing with you! / venting too lol
by: Sarah

Hey, i have no idea when you posted this! But I just wanted to comment and say, I FEEL FOR YOU! Although my youngest is 2 1/2 [3 end of Feb] and still has his "Ei-ah" binky/pacifier. He's in early intervention since roughly 3 months old. He has graduated from physical therapy, but still sees his occupational therapist,DI, & feeding/speech therapist.

His OT is so understanding and helpful about it. But his feeding/speech therapist is SOO against it! We see her once a week and every single time she is like on top of me about getting rid of it! I could seriously cry! I'm like, your welcome to come sleep over for how ever long it takes [she wouldn't even last half a night] he is impossible to get to sleep without it! We're working on it of course.

When my husband leaves for work we put it up on the table under the living room tv. [He's very big into KNOWING exactly where it is at all times] He gets it back at nap time, and at bed time. But of course he has his days! We have WAAAY more (bad) days than good. Myself along with his OT know/think it is at the very least 85% if not 100% Sensory related. He mostly chews on it then actual sucking. And when he doesn't have it he has his fingers or whatever else he can get into his mouth in there! [I Myself have this issue too! I am constantly chewing on inedible objects]


Your doing your best for your baby! I totally understand and seriously empathize with you mama! I have no clue if you'll ever even see this but it's worth a shot lol! If you ever wanna chat let me know! I can give you my email or Facebook!

Apr 21, 2021
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I understand!
by: Anonymous

Hello! Just here to offer empathy and support. My 4 year old just went to the dentist yesterday, and of course she told me to get rid of it. My son literally told me it "makes me feel safe at bedtime". It’s so hard. We actually couldn’t find it last night, and I just rolled with it. I said "hey, we can’t find it, and the dentist told you it’s time to say bye to it anyway". So maybe the stars just aligned 😂

My moms advice was always that he would get rid of it when he was ready. And so will your daughter. Best of luck! 💕

Apr 06, 2021
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Toss it already
by: Anonymous

Oh lawdy, if your 5 year old, or, even your 2 year old has a pacifer-still, you are the one with issues

Mar 16, 2021
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It is really that important?
by: Melanie

She is a child and she will get rid of it when she is ready. She will have a life time to suffer, why make her suffer now?

My 5 year old soothe herself with a pacifier and sleep with one. Everytime she ask for it, she is stressed or crying.

I refuse to answer her when she talks with it. She is very intelligent and she already understood that the pacifier is for babies and other people see it badly and she leaves it at home.

Adults soothe themselves with alcohol, food, drugs, sports and sex.

Please tell me how sucking on a pacifier is wrong but the above is not?

Why ask my child to grow up so quickly? She is 5 years old and not too long ago, she was only 4. She will always be my baby and if a pacifier helps her getting through the day instead of overeating so be it.

FYI: I was an obese person from childhood and I am trying to avoid that for her.

Feb 25, 2021
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Wow
by: Anonymous

Your the adult... time to get your acts together and take it away. If your daughter can't cope without a soother at that age I don't think your setting her up for a very successful life


- father of 5

Jan 08, 2021
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Same boat
by: Anonymous

My son is 5 and a half. He still uses his as well. He has ocd, spd, anxiety etc. He chews them to bits though and finding it dangerous. But if he doesn't have it like yours, everything goes on his mouth. Marbles etc. Stuff he can choke on. I also tried all the sensory necklace chewing things. Nothing has worked. I'm at a loss too. But he also has apraxia of speech. So I'm in a tight spot as well.

Dec 05, 2020
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Don't worry
by: Anonymous

Hi there ....ny son is turning 5 in a couple days ....he has SPD and asd(high functioning/aspergers ) he is the exact same way he uses it for the same reasons and even says I'm a big boy and hands it to me too ......I've also tried the chew things and he hates them .....If that is what he needs in times that could turn into a meltdown without one then thats what im giving him ...its other ppl who make you feel that its not ok and they can suck it lol you do what you think is best for your little girl and don't be bothered with peoples opinions

Nov 19, 2020
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For Janelle T
by: Anonymous

Even if she is using it to feel like a baby, I think it's okay to let her use the paci. Regressing isn't a bad thing (if that's even what it is). It's just part of her processing. She may be trying to hang on to her childhood - perhaps scared of the changes she's going through. You can talk with her about it and see if she's overwhelmed. She may need comforting or reassurance. Hugs!

Nov 19, 2020
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bedwetting daughter using pacifier
by: Janelle T.

Our daughter is 13 and in puberty and is bedwetting because of it,She started the bedwetting last year just past age 12 and we got her Goodnites to wear to bed,but she broke out in rashes from them,so i tried other disposable products with her and the same thing-rashes!As a last resort,we got her cloth diapers and plastic pants that she now wears everynight to bed and so far no rashes!

Before bedtime,i put the cloth diapers and plastic pants on her,and a few months back,she started using a pacifier to suck on while i am putting the diapers and plastic pants on her,then she gets into bed with it.She claims it helps relax her while i am diapering her and also to fall asleep faster!So far i believe her,but am wondering if she is using that as an excuse to make her feel like a baby when she is in bed.

Jul 10, 2019
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5 1/2 year old with bobo
by: Anonymous

My son is 5 1/2 almost 6 and going to be starting kindergarten soon, I don't know what to do. He needs his bobo (pacifier) and blankie with out them, at some points in the day he'll have a few meltdowns and the only thing that calms him down is those. He only gets them when he's anxious, tired, or has a meltdown.

I don't know what to do when he starts school can't have them. His doctor says he's just spoiled, that's not the word he used but that's what I got out of it. My son also has other issues I think might be sensory issue's. I need to find a new doctor that can help me.

We tried to cut down on having them but getting rid of them isn't in the near future.

May 31, 2019
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Thank you!
by: Mommy of 3

Thank you, Anonymous poster, for taking the time to tell me what you did for your daughter. I really appreciate it and it's given me both hope and some ideas on how to approach this. THANK YOU!

May 29, 2019
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for 'mommy of 3'
by: Anonymous

Hi, I'm just responding to a recent poster 'mommy of 3'.

I completely understand! My daughter was 8 when she finally did it. It was starting to affect her front teeth, so I sat her down and we had a 'big girl' talk about it. I never had an issue with her having it, as she used it for comfort and anxiety at bedtime only. But when her front teeth started coming forward a bit I had to stop it.

She had her 8th birthday coming up, so we discussed how she was turning into a big girl. I think she was just ready. After our talk, she decided she was going to do it. She grabbed all her paci's and put them in a bin. She was so proud of herself and I explained that I was so proud of her, because I knew how hard it was going to be for her. I started crying and I think that made her feel like she had someone that understood. She had huge tears too! lol. We hugged and cried, and then I think she was ready.

The first few days I slept with her, and I think it helped> I told her she could cry if needed, but after the 3rd day, she was so darn proud of herself and I think she even felt relief that she wasn't dependent on it anymore...

We had a big outing a week later, and she picked out a toy for doing such a great job.

I think her noticing her teeth were changing was a big awakening for her as well.

Anyway, Just be there for her, and acknowledge that you know how big a deal it is for her. She may need you for comfort for a while, but she will get there. Good luck!

May 28, 2019
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Still using paci at almost 7 yrs
by: Mommy of 3

I'm back to comment again - my daughter will be 7 and she *still* uses her paci. Just pops it in randomly when we're at home during the day on weekends. Never an issue in school. It's just a comfort thing, I guess. She still sleeps with it overnight as well. HOW do I get her to stop? Chewy necklace didn't work, and she knows it's going to mess with her teeth. At this point, do we just go cold turkey? Need some insights! Thanks!

May 21, 2019
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Toddler pacifier use
by: Anonymous

I couldn't believe when I first read that they allow you to use 10,000 characters to share your story with other people who are struggling with similar issues. This is definitely a outlet to allow us parents to deal with our issues as much as find an answer to deal with our child's issues LOL.

I've taken the time to read a couple of these from different people or having the same issue with their child use of a pacifier, personally I haven't found one story with the actual answer to the question how do I get my son or daughter to stop using the pacifier?

And I certainly haven't read any stories from a father like myself who came on the site to find out if the use of a pacifier is for security as many professional say why is it that my three-year-old son only uses his pacifier at his mother's house and doesn't speak of it at all when he stays at my house his mother and I have been apart since he was born we live together for a few short months when he was two trying to make things work between the two of us and to my disappointment things just didn't work out.

Our son just recently turned three and hasn't used a pacifier at my house for months, in fact he doesn't bring it up at all he doesn't ask for it at night before bed like he used to and even though he spends from Wednesday to Sunday at my house without a pacifier he still goes to his mother's house and expects that it's there for him at bedtime. He's always adapted to his surroundings in fact I think you've been through a lot for being a three year old but he absolutely will not go to sleep at his mother's house without his pacifier he doesn't even want to try.

It makes me sad because I think it's security because his father's not there or at least like us that's what I wanted to think until I read several stories married couples or together and having the same issue I don't think that there is a perfect answer for something that's going to work and Ira circumstance and asking a bunch of different people the same question only leads to a possibility of different answers and in most cases people can only tell you what they learned growing up.

With that said I think continuing to allow our children 2 rely on an inanimate object for security it's not much different than feeding an addiction with any addiction you have a period of withdrawals some AR extremely painful and others are nothing more than a mindset in most cases there's not much anyone outside of the person who has the addiction can do other than stop enabling or feeding the addiction. It might be hard to do but once a child is able to recognize that they will be fine without it they won't obsess about as much.

I can only share with people what I've experienced with my own children and for anybody who has a newborn child who is reading this I would suggest playing piano or harp music for your child before they fall asleep let them fall asleep to that music I I've done that for my son since he was born his mother used to do the same but since we separated she quit doing it but my son has never sucked his thumb and other than the occasional I don't want to take a nap once he's laying down he falls asleep immediately goes to bed at a good hour and he sleeps through the night he's now addicted to books which I'm happy to do before any nap or bed read him a short story and he's happy to take a nap and have you to go to bed without a pacifier or thumb or blankie or a pillow and I'm not saying he doesn't have those things I'm just saying he doesn't require a specific item to go to sleep of the night.

I wish the best to everyone.

Mar 11, 2019
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SPD
by: Anonymous

My son is almost 41/2. He still needs his pacifier for bed time. Trying to break this habit has been a nightmare. I've tried setting an alarm to get him use to laying in bed with out it but he just chews on everything, tossing and turning acting frantic like. Breaks my heart.

He has SPD and I believe he uses the pacifier for a soothing mechanism due to his SPD. At this point I think he just isn't ready. Im just concerned about his teeth.

I to this day chew on my nails till they bleed and I'm a smoker. So I'm wondering if a oral fixation has been passed down. He has tried the chewys and the chewy necklaces but it just doesn't sooth him like the darn pacifier does.

Dec 05, 2018
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Why not
by: Why not

My girl at 5 years has a paci too. And I say - why not?

Jul 26, 2018
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Wish me and my son luck pls folks. Oral surgery ends the binky.
by: MKT

Well, for starters it's nice to read the comments here and not feel like my son is a SUPER rare case lol. Smart kid, a lil whiny, but very sweet natured.

He is just a lil shy of 5 and a half and will start kindergarten in the fall. He has held onto his binkys like they are a lifeline..if he was allowed he'd have it in most of the day while just playing or whatever, though obviously I haven't allowed it in a long, long time aside from not a bit ago when he was pretty darn sick with a stomach bug..

Anyways, he typically falls asleep with it, then it falls out.. He may try and find it in the night if he's woken up enough but that's really his main binky time. He has a very emotional attachment to it, and assumes his binky must miss him too lol.

But today it had to go.. There was no ifs, ands, or buts about it, he had oral surgery this a.m, and had 2 decayed baby teeth pulled, which I link in part to the continued use of the binky (though I cleaned and sanitized them often) and his father's poor baby teeth, since we take care of his teeth properly.

But ya, either way the binks have to go, since there's a HUGE risk of him getting dry socket from using it. Most of you know what I mean but for those who do not: dry socket is an extremely painful condition that results when the blood clots that naturally form in the holes where pulled teeth were are ripped out. Can lead to infection, but as I am told is horrible just in general. That's why they advise adults against using straws or smoking for a bit after having teeth pulled.. it's the sucking motion.

My son is fit to be tied tonight.. My oral surgeon even gave me a .5 mg pill of sedative to try and get him over the hump tonight, to give him half at first and if we get nowhere to give him the other .25mgs...Well here we are at midnight and he's had the whole .5mgs and is fighting sleep like a champion.. He does not seem in pain from the procedure at all, he is just very bitter about not being able to have his bink, no matter how I, my mother, the oral surgeon and the nurse all tried to explain it to my son.

Ironically we did get rid of the binky back when he was 4, for about 2 weeks, but I was in the hosp for a short stay and my mother caved and gave it back to him. It truly does make me sad, to think I'm taking away something my son truly loves and gives him comfort.. He is my only child and is my entire world.

But there's more teeth to be fixed on him, and his reg dentist has a real hard line policy on the binky, when he saw him in May he all but chewed my head off for still allowing my 5 yr old to sleep with a binky, and def made me feel like a real loser for doing it. Obvious I did not have my son and imagine him still having a pacifier in use at almost 5 and a half, but who among us do?


I will give u this warning: my son has a lot of decay, and it all sprung up over about a 6 mos period of time like going from 0 to 60.. His teeth have been brushed from as early on as possible and he uses fluoride rinse too for about a yr now and still we have these prbs..I am so sad tonite, and I know ive got a long few nights and days ahead with my son, but some times things need to happen.

God bless each and every one of you, and I hope those who read this will feel at least somewhat better.

Jul 24, 2018
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We took my son off his binky at age 5 1/2 cold turkey
by: Anonymous

Hi
Everyone's comments and stories have been so helpful and encouraging. There is SO much judgement out there about kids still being on the pacifier. With the encouragement of a therapist we took my 5 1/2 yr old son off his "binky" cold turkey. I was NOT on board with this completely. I think it more irritated and embarrassed my husband. The first night was absolutely terrible! I cried and he cried.

It's been about 16 days now. The worst part of all is he now having HUGE SENSORY ISSUES. He's had them for a long time now: sensitive to loud sounds (public auto toilets, fire/police cars, vacuums, etc), speech therapy for 3 years, tags cut out of all clothes, picky eater, and more. In the last 2 weeks he won't wear shirts, socks or shoes. He had a complete melt down over how his seat belt felt. This was scary and of course it's the law to wear it. At least he did it on 2 separate occasions with just my hubby one time and me one time. (Sometimes I feel like people think it's my parenting! Geesh). He wanted to go swimming. Yet didn't like how his swim trunks felt. Nor how his undies/shorts felt. So he was sobbing that he wanted to swim yet couldn't feel good in anything to swim in. It's heart breaking watching your child go through this.

Of course his dentist wanted him off his binky Yet at the same time she was understanding as her own daughter still had her binky at age 4.

I've called an occupational therapist. We sure need help since school is only 3 weeks away. He has to be able to wear clothes, shoes and a seat belt. My hubby doesn't want him back on the binky. Yet I say do you want to go on like this? I think there is a definite correction to ending the binky cold turkey and now his sensory issues are so bad.

Thanks to everyone in advance for understanding. I think as moms/parents we need to have the "NO JUDGEMENT ZONE" for each other. It's the least we can do. Thanks for your prayers too!

May 25, 2018
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Pacifier Use at 5 1/2
by: Anonymous

I think your right on letting it continue. The doctor is correct about health aspects, but mentally your daughter prefers it for stress, but is lessoning herself.

As she gets a bit older 6 start working on keeping the use from Public to home. And If she turns 7 and uses it, its then you can completely start to fix the problem. Stress is a function, and your daughter has trouble managing it. There are ways around it, and I would advise those ways, as she gets a bit older.

You CAN cut it right now, but it involves old fashioned methods, and involving her to force her to STOP. A sock on her finger, pepper on the thumb, etc. But it will cause her well she might not stick stuff in her mouth as much this time because shes maturing to a small child, but it could cause her a number of other side effects such as temper tantrums.

It can be building, as well as stressful to take this route. I would say your best bet would be to help her regulate her time and use for the time being. 2 and a half hours a day could be a bit high. But not bad. The regulation is for health concerns. Good Luck.

Feb 11, 2018
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Working on giving up paci at 5 1/2 years old...
by: LCM

I have boy/girl twins, and my girl has always used a paci. We moved internationally when she was 3, and with all the changes and traveling... the paci was a saving grace. At 5, we finally took our pediatricians advice and tied it to the wall by her bed. She can still have it, but it's in her room, on her bed and not convenient. This transition wasn't too hard... and a great step to limiting paci time, which is mostly just to go to sleep. And the occasional melt down.

Was a little challenging breaking the habit of having it in the car on shorter trips, but she adapted in 1-2 times. We did succumb on the cross country flight last month, as safety net. She went 2 1/2 hours before asking for it. Progress. My dentist said it's harder to stop thumb sucking, and encouraged we continue when she was 4.

But, had a conversation with the Montessori school's headmaster on Monday. My daughter is now 5 1/2. She said that now is time. None of her friends still use a paci, and she knows it. It's something she carries with her each day, which is a burden. Breaking free to the other side will be empowering for her.

Because paci's aren't allowed at school, she has found other ways to regulate at school. I need to give her that opportunity to do the same at home. Because when she does, she's going to feel so proud and good about herself. That's what I'm staying focused on.

She kind of wants to do it, but it's clear at this point it's an addiction. The book Power of Habit by Charles Huhigg says, the way you break any habit loop is by substituting a new behavior when the craving comes. The habit loop is -- anxiety --> behavior (paci) --> reward (feeling calm). In simple terms, when anxiety arises, what NEW behavior can we/our child do to find calm? Breathing, music, a new snuggly stuffed animal, lavender oil, visualizing something soothing.

Sounds so easy, right.

We talked about it on Thursday evening, and started on Friday night. After attempting to negotiate for a later date, I said that her "prize" for staying off the paci was going to her best friends bday party (something she was really looking forward to because they'll get made up and be in a fashion show) IOn our way to school Friday, she finally said, "Fine. The Paci Fairy can take all the pacis."

I threw the pacis all away. Though hid 2 for memorabilia. But they are gone as far as she knows. The paci fairy left a note for her saying "She was ready! Congratulations!"

The last two nights have been tough. She was perfectly fine until 8:30pm -- late bedtime. Last night she cried and tantrumed and screamed "I want my paci!" for 40 minutes before asking for a book. She was calm then, and went right to sleep while I rubbed her back.

Tonight was a little harder. At 8:30, same screaming "I want my paci! I don't want to go to the birthday party. I want my paci back." It was shorter --but more intense -- for about 30 minutes. Progress.

Both nights what helped was when I felt deep genuine empathy, to the point of my tears. If you've seen the movie "Inside Out" you'll understand. Connecting with her sadness helped.

I know this is an old thread, but it was helpful to read all the comments here, and wanted to share the "tie the paci to the wall" tip because transitioning to a very limited access is helpful. During the day, she's been 100% fine, happy and joyful. We just have to get through the hump of relearning how to go to sleep without the paci. I'm choosing to believe in her. But it's not easy. Will post getting to the other side... hopefully in the next few days.

Jan 01, 2018
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Not Here to Judge
by: Twin Mom

As a mom of twins, I can say that it all comes down to the child. They are individuals. Twins are brought up under the exact same environmental circumstances from conception, yet are different.

My girl twin never felt the need for a pacifier, or any other soother. My boy twin still feels the need for his pacifier, or "B", at age 5, at home only. Both kids see a Developmental Pediatrician due to prematurity. Both kids are thriving cognitively and socially. We encourage but don’t harass our son to give up his B, he obviously needs it.

Consider this, if your child is a thumb sucker, there is nothing you can do to take his/her thumb away. I sucked my thumb (openly at home only, sneakily elsewhere) until I was in first grade, despite my parents pleading and bribes. I finally decided to stop on my own when I was ready. Traded thumb sucking for hair twirling.

Never had braces and have perfect teeth. If there were a chance my son’s pacifier would necessitate the need for braces, I’d rather pay for orthodontics than future psychotherapy for snatching his pacifier away.

Dec 14, 2017
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In the same boat
by: Mommy of 3

Thank you for this thread! It's so helpful and encouraging to see I'm not alone.

My middle child is 5 and still uses her paci as a comforting mechanism. I've begun to worry about her teeth, but the dentist said so far, so good, but soon she will be losing her baby teeth. That is my only concern, as she is a very tender and sensitive child who needs her paci and blankie to help her regulate sometimes. I'm fine with that. She doesn't take them out in public, except in the car sometimes.

She's fine in school and when we are out and about, but she asks for them when at home. Her older and younger siblings never cared for pacifiers or loveys of any kind, but she makes up for it!

Anyone have any helpful thoughts on other items I could transition her to (like a necklace designed for sucking on or something)? I am beginning to wonder if I need to try to transition her to something or just let her stop on her own. Thoughts?

Dec 03, 2017
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Pacifier
by: Anonymous

My daughter is 4. Her mother is very strict and literally took the pacifier from her. She doesnt use it at her house neither at school, I believe she accepts that for fear.

When she gets to my home, daddy’s home, the first thing she asks for is where is my tete and you can see she enjoy it and loves walking around with more than three at hand. I couldnt find any scientific study neither rejecting or accepting the pacifier. To me the pacifier is a sugar free gum, who doesnt love chewing gum.

Dont worry, your child will be fine.

Sep 11, 2017
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Paci for all ages
by: Anonymous

I wish more parents, mostly moms, would just be there for each other and support each other. Every person parents differently. Unless u r beating u r children or harming them in some way u r not wrong.

No one is wrong or right when it comes to the pacifier. We do what is best for our children and every child is different. I have 6 wonderful children. A few didn't use a paci at all. A couple only used it for a few months.

My youngest,now 5,still uses his at night. And I don't care, and it doesn't hurt anyone. People need to just stop judging. Stop calling out people for doing something u don't agree with. Just because some think it's wrong doesn't make it wrong.

And for the adult man that still uses a paci, so what. There r plenty of adults that get stressed and use drugs or alcohol to 'solve' their problems.

Using a paci really isn't so bad

Jul 11, 2017
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Paci at 5
by: Anonymous

I met with an occupational therapist about my own child's use of a pacifier at 5. She was very clear that some children have a need for what is called "non-nutritive sucking" which helps organize emotions and calm them in stressful situations. It is directly related to the brain.

She was absolutely fine with him having the pacifier at 5 because of this reason and he also had a natural oral fixation (so everything went in his mouth -- toys, pencils, fingers, etc. to chew on).

One day after visiting the dentist, he just gave it up all on his own. No muss, no fuss. My dentist, by the way, was fine with him having it as long as he gave it up before 7 when his adult teeth started to come in.

According to two different pediatric dentists I've been to, childhood pacifiers don't damage adult teeth or make their adult teeth "buck" teeth unless the pacifier is not gone by the time they are growing in.

I always hate when people push other parents to make their kid get rid of a pacifier. You have no idea what is best for another person's child or what their needs are. Parents need to just be supportive and stop judging. No one ever went to school with a pacifier in their mouth. Why seeing someone else's child with a pacifier would bother someone I will never understand.

May 18, 2017
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Thanks Anon 'I'm 25'
by: Anonymous

Thank you 'I'm 25 Anon',

My daughter is 8 and she just won't let it go. She and I went through some emotional trauma when she was 3-4, so she associates having it with a source of comfort/safety. I personally don't mind if she has it, but getting a hard time from family members. She has full-blown panic attacks when I try to talk to her about getting rid of it.

Thanks for your comment, it's nice that you don't have any dental issues (that was MY only concern). Can I ask your reasons for wanting it? Is it a comfort thing as well, or more of an oral fix? Just curious. Thanks :)

May 18, 2017
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I'm 25
by: Anonymous

Although your child doesn't use it often I am 25 and still use a pacifier. My parents broke me when I was like 5 or 6 from my paci but I picked it back up around 8 years old.

I don't have any behavioral issues that I know of and live a normal life - full time employment, 9 classes away from bachelor degree, married, one child. The funny thing is mt child won't take a paci at all.

Anyways my mom would limit me - only at the house only at bed. But it doesn't matter now and I do it all the time. From the moment I get into my car after work (after driving a few miles away) to first thing when I wake up. It's embarrassing though and I wish I didn't. But I can't stop. If I do I get easily irritated and stressed can't sleep so forth so forth.

So idk if it's better to intervene because if you don't your child may end up like me. But also it's not a big deal it's not hurting anyone also my teeth are fine no buck teeth here and I've never needed braces.

Apr 28, 2017
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pacifier use in older aged children
by: Anonymous

I am a practicing speech pathologist. I want to offer some suggestions that may help with removing the pacifier.

I had a cousin who had surgery to correct a dislocated hip when she was younger. She used a pacifier and the doctor recommended these suggestions after her surgery to help wean her from her pacifier.

It seems like your child is already limiting herself when using it. My cousin's mother allowed my cousin to use her pacifier at first only in their yard, then only in their house, then only in her room, then only at specific times in her room (i.e. bedtime, etc.) and then gradually decreased those until it was no longer an issue. It worked wonderfully for her.

I don't know the special needs your child has; however, maybe this will help. I believe you are a concerned and loving mother, and that you do really want to help your child.

Mar 18, 2017
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You are a great mom
by: Anonymous

It sounds like you are a wonderful caring mother. I think as a society that we force things way to soon based on what we think is socially right - not based on what we think might be best for our children. We have so many rules for children it amazes me - they must sit still all the time, they must sleep thru the night by 1 yr of age, they must not use a bottle after 1 yr of age, they must not use a pacifier after 6 months old.

I think most of these decisions are made from social pressures...and not because it's right for the child. Each child is different. You know your child so do what's right for him/her and don't let anyone else tell you that you are a bad parent because you don't follow their rules. There are things as parents we should control (ie bad behaviour) but controlling when a kid stops using his bottle or pacifier seems silly.

I have yet to know any kid that's in middle school carrying one of those around. My opinion is to let them wean on their own. My son used his bottle until he was 3 or 4...then no longer wanted it. There were no fights, no crying...he just did it on his own terms.

I commend you for thinking further on this issue instead of letting social pressure affect you and your daughter or son. Goodluck!

Mar 08, 2017
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Suckie
by: Anonymous

It's your job as a parent to help your child to grow into a healthy functional adult. I think parents think its easier to just give their kids what they want and give in because they don't want to deal with it. Big mistake on the parents part.Allowing your child to suck on a soother at the age of 5 is wrong. Think of the child the damage its going to do to their teeth and the expense its going to cost you, what if they have a sleepover and and then get picked on by other kids.Its called tough love throw it away it may be hard for a day or two or maybe weeks. As long as you keep allowing it trust me they will keep sucking on it, they won't stop on their own. I personal think its wrong for a parent to allow their 5 year old to suck on a soother they are for babies!! You as the parent are the only one who can do something about this....Throw the damn thing away!!

Feb 27, 2017
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Love your kids
by: Mike singleton

How about being a parent and telling the kid to stop and take the pacifier away? Maybe a temper tantrum will ensue. Maybe not. The child needs to know that he doesn't dictate how it goes. The parents do.

These kids will be shunned or bullied by their peers if they aren't taught how to behave appropriately.

Love your kids enough to stand up up for them.

Jan 23, 2017
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Pacifiers and older children
by: Anonymous

I believe with all my heart that children who hang on to their pacifiers beyond infancy do so because their neurological systems need to suck. Their primitive reflexes have not yet integrated properly. Thankfully, there is lots of information coming in all the time about the health and development of the sensory and neurological systems.

Apparently, many children today have an unhealthy digestive system which hinders development in many other ways. If you start investigating special diets that help to rebuild probiotic and digestive health, you will be amazed.

Once you clean up a child's diet, you can look into treatments that help to mature and rewire the sensory system. Treatments like GAPS diet, Rhythmic Movement Training and MNRI make so much sense. Personally, I hate that children are being forced to give up sucking before their sucking reflex matures and integrates.

Nov 03, 2016
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Update/Response
by: Heather

Hello. Sadly, she has not given it up completely. Things are pretty similar as before. She is 7 now. She mostly only uses it as a tool to calm her when she is feeling upset or out of control and to fall asleep. We had a big move to anew house which set things back and we were without riding therapy all summer due to the heat. She also has a new friend next door who is very bossy and controlling so she usually can't play with her without needing it at least once or more. She tried to hide it for awhile but her friend found it. Her friend is supportive and will remind her to bring it when she goes next door. Most days we only need it a couple of times but ithers we need more often. Her OT said it is a tool for her and she will give it up when she feels she doesn't need it anymore. We have tried ither things but she doesn't like chewlry and she can't have lollipops because of dyes and she doesn't like the natural ines because they are usually too sour. Those are some things you can try. Lollipops were good but it was the dyes that did us in.

My advice is just hang in there. It gets better with time and use becomes less frequent without even trying. I found my daughter uses it because she needs it. It is how she copes with her emotions and feeling out of control. Hope this helps.

Nov 03, 2016
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Has she had any success giving it up yet?
by: P. Collson

Has she had any success giving it up yet? I'm curious bc my daughter is 4 1/2, & still uses hers. Would like to know if your little one gave it up on her own eventually or bc of an active effort on your part? Heeeelp please?! 😬

Sep 18, 2016
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Pacifier
by: Anonymous

My 4 year old (will be 5 in Feb) still uses his paci but only to sleep at night not for naps. He knows it's not normal because he doesn't even want his grandparents to see him with it only myself and his dad are allowed to see him use it. as soon as he wakes up he takes it out of his mouth and won't ask for it until bedtime.

I'm not too worried about it. I sucked my thumb until I was 6 and I think I would have done less damage to my teeth and palate had I used a pacifier instead of my thumb. It was like magic- I turned 6 and suddenly stopped sucking my thumb completely.

I'm hoping this will be what happens with my son and the pacifier.. He is otherwise a completely normal, active, very witty child who is quite advanced for his age.

Sep 08, 2016
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My 4 yr old still uses a nuk
by: Anonymous

My 4 yr old is still using a nuk. When she was a baby I decided to give it to her because otherwise she would have been sucking on her thumb or other fingers. I also have noticed she has some anxiety, when she gets upset, we're talking screaming tantrums, it helps to have her nuki....and for my own sanity. She is now in 4K and doesn't use it all day, a good 9 hours without it. However once were home she has it right away. I feel like I need to break her from it but we also need to get her tantrums and anger issues under control. I'm curious what are these other soothing necklaces? Where do you find them?

May 09, 2016
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baby bottle
by: Emma

My son will be 3 soon and his pacifier / dummy is his tommee tippee baby bottle. I have tried teething rings sometimes he will use when he wants to have a good bite. We have tried vitamins too as read that she children bite they could be lacking vitamins. No joy. I know your little one doesn't bite though just a comfort for her. I think 2 hours isn't a great deal of time all things considered.xx

Apr 19, 2016
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5yr 2 months still using paci
by: Anonymous

My daughter turned 5 in February and still uses the paci along with the blanky. They always go together. She packs them in her handbag when leaving the house (except for school). Puts them in safe keeping when leaving for school, so she knows exactly where to find it when she gets home.

When she's on her tablet or watching TV she has it. Even when doing cartwheels, tumbles and bridges she has it in her mouth. I've tried losing it sometimes, but it is a torture for both of us.

O, did I mention?, she also takes the bottle at nights and when she awakes in the mornings.

She's a very brilliant child, fully normal, involved in much athletics and quite mature for her age...well except for the bottle and paci.

Any advice???

Feb 27, 2016
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5 1/2 year old still uses pacifier UPDATE
by: Anonymous

Hello, I decided to post an update as same situation asked for update or tips etc. My daughter is now 6 1/2. Yes, she still uses her sucky. In addition to SPD she has low muscle tone, OCD, anxiety possibly APD which they will test for when she is 7. I have given up trying to force it away. Conversations with her OT said she uses it as a tool. Ibtried all the chewy stuff as well but it doesnt work for her. OT and I talked and I came to the conclusion that she will stop using it when she feels she doesn't need it anymore.

We were referred to a developmental pediatrician for evaluation. My hope is when anxiety is under control she wont need it anymore.

She has started riding therapy and that has made a world of difference just after 2 classes. Anxiety is not gone but reduced and has much more confidence. She is even attempting to go without it more often.

I believe she/they will outgrow it when they no longer have a need for that particular tool. If yiu have not had her evaluated I would suggest it. OTs are very helpful with the right one. Our first one was not si great but this time around we have the best. Also if you have riding therapy in your area look into it. It is amazing! Please let me know if you need more advice or suggestions or support.

I promise you are not alone.

Feb 26, 2016
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same situation!
by: Anonymous

I am just coming across this now bc my daughter is very similar!

She wasn't even as attached to her "binky" when she was younger but now she is 5 1/2 (going to be 6 in June) and she's attached to it- she bites through it though. She definitely has some sensory disorder type stuff going on-
She does the same exact thing- she will bite on whatever she can get her hands her- metal, handles, ect- so we figured Jr. was safer to just let her have her binky- (we tried the chew tubes, chew necklaces but she doesn't really love them) I try to give her even floss picks (bc I chew on them throughout the day) we were even on vacation & she was chewing on one of her dolls:(

I know this post was written a little while ago, does your daughter still chew on the pacifier? Is it something you think they'll just grow out of?

We debate taking it away but then feel bad bc we know it's helps relax her when she's tired ect-

Dec 05, 2015
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6 YO still uses
by: Anonymous

My adopted daughter watched her entire family and home burn to the ground when she was only 2. She still has nightmares about it now at 6. I let her have it pretty much anytime she's at home. She's had a rough life.

Jul 27, 2015
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Thank you
by: Anonymous

Thank you for posting this. My daughter is almost six and is still using her pacifier. She has been through some rough times and has extremely high anxiety. Her paci was her calming mechanism and I've never had a problem with it. She's weaned down to mostly night time and when she's tired or upset- at home only now. She gets VERY upset and panics when I try to approach getting rid of it when she turns six next week. Her teeth are perfectly straight. However, I'm getting so much pressure and negativity from other family members I'm at a loss what to do.

Anyway, thank you for posting this. It's just nice to know I'm not alone. :)

Jul 22, 2015
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Pacifiers
by: LornaB

What a brilliant, instinctive mum you sound, you speak such good sense. Your little girl sounds lovely, and deserves to have her own instincts trusted too. She uses it when she needs to, and you love and accept her regardless. Just wonderful mothering. I'm no expert, but I,d say carry on just the way you are! Ps my son had a bottle till eight, doesn't now, no big deal.

Mar 11, 2015
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Do not worry
by: Anonymous

First off I know that we tend to listen to doctors because they are supposed to know everything but the thing is they see them for what 10 minutes every few months? So when it comes to our children we sometimes know more than the doctors. Don't let him bully you especially when the therapist who sees her much more often and spends much more time with her is unconcerned about it. Honestly my daughter who had no special issues was at least 4 maybe even 5 before giving it up completely. It is a source of comfort to some children and at times they need that comfort. Why take that away? I don't think it hurts anything to let her have it the little bit that she needs it. One day she won't need it anymore and it will be her choice and far less traumatizing. Good luck to you and do what YOU feel is best for YOUR child no matter what anyone says

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