Music

by Char
(Green Bay, WI)

My son is 7. It wasnt until he was 3 that we realized he had SPD. Those first 3 years were so joyful, but so, so very difficult. We knew something was different. We thought he had Asbergers. Friends of our have a son with that. At the time their son was in his mid teens. But, as a whole, they got along great. So similar in the things they enjoyed, the things that soothed / upset them. But our son is VERY emotionally connected to us and others so that was what gave us pause on continuing the autism route.

Friends of friends made a kind observation of our son and told us about SPD, their young nephew has it. We took it "under advisement", I called the nephew's mother and she told me about 'Sensational Kids'. I ordered it, put it on a shelf for 3 or 4 months (out of fear I didnt really feel the need to look into it). One day, for whatever reason I started reading. The first example of the boy at church who always cried during the hymns made me break down. THAT is my son. He ALWAYS would cry when 'emotional' music was played. Even before he could talk he would cry if a sentimental song was on the radio or if a moving song was played in our congregation. Instinctively I knew that's why he was crying, even though he couldnt tell me that. I knew because I have always had the same emotional reaction to music. To this day I still have it, I just know how to control it. Once he was able to talk, but before we realized he has SPD, he would tell me, "Momma, this music makes me sad' and I would turn the station or I would just hold him tight if I couldnt change the music.

Once I read that example in the book I knew this was the answer to helping our child. He wasnt a 'brat' - he just processes things differently. Amongst the other things we discovered (sensory seeking, over responsivity), he is an EXTREMELY emotional child. I didnt realize there were books just on HSP, so I'll be ordering those immediately. The gamut of emotions that can be displayed in just a few minutes is alot to handle at times. But learning how to cope and help him has been life saving for our family. We also realized that as he gets older the issues change - some kind of go away, some are the same and some surface. It's a continual learning process.

Both my husband and I have certain SPD issues. It sure does explain alot. It has helped reframe how we view our son and each other.